I get confused about Healing and Home, in a chicken-or-egg sort of way.

By Healing, I mean what Christians often call sanctification—the sacred pathway of becoming.

By Home I mean, “It is finished.” (see John 19:30) Christ accomplished all, and all is mine and His, and we are one. (The Christian ideas of justification and glorification may both be included here).

Which comes first, Healing or Home? Home leads to Healing because it tells me the truth about who I am, but Healing brings me Home because it enables me to believe the truth about who I am.

Wondering which one follows the other may be a distraction from the miracle that both are forever true. Home stands complete, perfect, sure and strong as granite. Healing takes the journey, bearing witness to growth and death and life—transformation on repeat. Healing leads me Home … but Home permits me to Heal.

The Bible—which at this time is an enigma to me—says much about Home and Healing. It speaks about what we have now, and what we are moving toward; about how things are, were, and will be. It’s all mixed up together. Take the first chapter of Ephesians, for example.

I pray that your hearts will be flooded with light so that you can understand the confident hope He has given to those He called—His holy people who are His rich and glorious inheritance. I also pray that you will understand the incredible greatness of God’s power for us who believe Him. This is the same mighty power that raised Christ from the dead and seated him in the place of honor at God’s right hand in the heavenly realms. Now He is far above any ruler or authority or power or leader or anything else—not only in this world but also in the world to come. God has put all things under the authority of Christ and has made Him head over all things for the benefit of the church. And the church is His body; it is made full and complete by Christ, who fills all things everywhere with Himself.

Ephesians 1:18-23 NLT

I feel a bit woozy after I read this passage. Past, present, future—it’s all there. And what a lineup of shocking statements. I am part of God’s inheritance (why does He have an inheritance?). God’s power for me is the power that resurrected Jesus. Jesus has authority over all authorities, “not only in this world, but also in the world to come.” The church is Christ’s body (say what?). “All things everywhere” are filled with Christ (really? All and everywhere are VERY inclusive words).

But I’m gonna roll with it. God my Father placed Christ above all things, and He placed me in Christ. He is “far above” because He is bigger and more alive than power and dominion and rules and authority.

I am in Him. By His stripes I am healed from control, because He is above control, and I am in Him. (see Isaiah 53:5) His authority supersedes the illusion of human control (the illusion that I can control myself or another person, or that I can be controlled by another person).

Even the apostle Paul seems astonished by (yet very confident about) this craziness.

What shall we say about such wonderful things as these? If God is for us, who can ever be against us? Since He did not spare even His own Son but gave Him up for us all, won’t He also give us everything else? Who dares accuse us whom God has chosen for His own? No one—for God Himself has given us right standing with Himself. Who then will condemn us? No one—for Christ Jesus died for us and was raised to life for us, and He is sitting in the place of honor at God’s right hand, pleading for us. Can anything ever separate us from Christ’s love? Does it mean He no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death? No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us. And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 8:31-35, 37-39 NLT

As I consider what little I can grasp from this shocking passage, I am surprised by this comfort: I belong. This is a relief.

I belong in (inside) Christ. I don’t need to worry, because I’m Home. I have arrived.

Sometimes I may feel lost—as if trying to read a map through tears. Or frozen still, breathing shallow, as shape-shifting shadows approach.

Yet nothing can separate me from the love of Jesus. I am always Home. I am always in His heart, His thoughts, His body. Whether I am thriving or dying, grieving or joyful, begging or praising, suffering or sitting pretty, married or divorced, addicted or sober, giving or taking …

I am Home, which is an invitation to Healing.

I am Healing, which is my invitation Home. The door is always open.